A Grateful Kind of Love Read online

“And don’t forget the Mountain Dew that we stole from your dad’s secret stash,” he says, bringing back so many memories.

  “Yes! You know, he still hides his Mountain Dew obsession from my mom. He still has that little refrigerator under his work bench in the garage. Though I’m pretty sure, after all these years, my mom knows about it.” I shake my head, grinning wide. “I bet she’s always known about it.”

  Landon sits back, leaning against the tree. “I love your mom. She’s good people.”

  I nod. “Yeah, she is. I can’t wait to tell her about us.”

  “Yeah.”

  I wrap up the remainder of my sub and take another drink. “Is this kind of crazy?”

  “What?”

  “Us.” I raise my hand, motioning between the two of us.

  “Depends,” Landon says seriously.

  My heart stutters nervously within my chest. “On?”

  “On whether crazy is a synonym for fucking awesome.”

  I laugh, shaking my head. “I don’t think it is.”

  “Well then, no … the verdict is, not crazy.”

  I crawl over toward Landon and straddle his legs. “I think it’s crazy good though.”

  “It’s definitely that. Who would have thought? Little Amy Madison, with her training bra swinging from the flag pole at church camp years ago, would end up here, with me.”

  “Hey. That was horrible. I cried the whole day.” I hit Landon’s arm. “Getting boobs is traumatic for some girls, and I was so embarrassed.”

  He wraps his hands around my hips. “I didn’t do it. It was that dick Johnny. I took it down. I’m just saying, all those years ago, I had the pleasure of returning your bra to you, and now, I get to see all of you whenever I want.” He shoots me a wink with a purse of his lips.

  I press my mouth into a tight line, feigning anger. “Okay, I believe you. And, speaking of my bra, you haven’t seen it since the night of the house party. What’s up with that? Why are we suddenly putting on the brakes?”

  Landon laughs. “Are things moving too slow for you?”

  “Ugh, yes … they are,” I scoff.

  Landon tightens the grip on my hips and pulls me toward him until our faces are so close that I can feel his warm breath against my lips.

  “Because, Amy, you’re not just a college hook-up. You’re not a girl I’m casually dating. You’re the girl I spent my summer evenings with, playing Marco Polo in your pool. You’re the girl whose family spends holidays and vacations with mine. You’re the daughter of my mom’s best friend. You’re the friend that I went to after Holly Kerby told my whole class that I’d tried to kiss her at the sixth-grade camp square dance and everyone in my grade called me Kissy Boy the rest of the year. You’re the girl I gave my old chemistry tests to, so you’d know what questions to expect since Mr. Barnes hadn’t changed the test since he started forty years prior.”

  I’m breathing heavy when Landon stops and tucks a lock of my hair behind my ear.

  “Amy, you’re the girl who chose to ride the Ferris wheel at the fair with me even though you’re terrified of heights and I threatened to throw you out.”

  I smile weakly, swallowing hard at the beautiful memories.

  “You’re the girl who caught lightning bugs with me and tried to feed me mud pies. You’re the girl who spied on Tricia Kent for me because I wanted to know what her favorite CD was, so I could arrange for her to find me listening to it while I just happened to be eating her favorite candy with extra to share. You’ve been my friend as long as I can remember. You’re the girl I can always count on.”

  Landon pauses, and his stare heats me to the core. “Regardless of how we started, I want to take my time with you now because you deserve someone who respects you enough to do so. Despite my past relationships, you’re the girl who makes me want to do this right. You’re my Amy Madison, and you deserve more than I can probably give. Yet you’re the girl who makes me want to try anyway.”

  My lip quivers as Landon takes my mouth in his. I thread my fingers through the back of his hair and pull his face against me. I want Landon in every way possible, and I can’t imagine a future where I wouldn’t want him. This is what people write stories about—this love, this connection.

  Tongues licking. Lips pulling. Breaths panting.

  He pulls his mouth from mine, and I sigh. He takes my face in his hands and places chaste kisses along my cheek, across my forehead, down my nose. Then, he gives me one more small peck on the lips.

  “You’re the girl who was right in front of me my whole life, and I never truly saw you. But I see you now.” The intensity in his eyes is so raw that I can feel every word down to my soul.

  The rest of the world has faded away, and it’s just me and Landon, suspended in this space of beautiful truths. Our history together plays so vividly in my mind. Each memory shines in full color with Landon at the center. I’m falling hard for Landon Porter, but I realize that I started falling a long time ago. I was always so inexplicably drawn to him. Our future together will be exquisite; I can feel it—so tangible and fierce that it squeezes me now.

  Landon cradles my jaw and draws my face to his. “You’re the girl who makes my life pretty fucking amazing,” he says in a husky whisper against my lips before taking me in a soul-devouring kiss.

  Amy

  Anniversaries.

  An incredible friend.

  Mint chocolate chip ice cream.

  The hot sun greets us as we exit the psychology building. It’s a perfect September day, one of those autumn days that feels more like summer than fall, and I love it.

  “So, any ideas about tonight?” Sebastian asks with a mischievous grin.

  “I told you no.” I smile, tapping him on the arm.

  “You did, but you know more than you’re letting on.”

  I have a sense for these things.

  I shake my head. “You’re ridiculous.”

  “But I’m right.” He purses his lips together, and I want to laugh.

  I adore the man beside me. I see him every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday in our Psychology of Sex class, but the last couple of weeks, we’ve started to hang out more. He’s become what I initially thought Megan would be—my college BFF. He and I clicked from the first moment we met.

  “I’m sure it will be romantic.” I shrug.

  “A given.”

  Landon has a surprise planned for tomorrow, our one-month anniversary. It’s crazy to think that, four weeks ago, I was having a night of marathon sex with my friend from home with no regard to how that night would change us. I’m so grateful it happened. This past month has been the best month of my life. Landon has always been a wonderful friend, but who knew he’d be an even better boyfriend?

  “Well, what are you hoping the surprise will include?” Bass asks.

  I shrug, letting out a wistful sigh. “It honestly doesn’t matter. Just being with Landon will be great.”

  “Lame!” Bass shouts loudly, causing me to jump.

  I hold my hand to my chest. “What? That’s true.”

  “Admit it, you’re hoping you do it. Bow chicka bow wow,” he chants loudly, causing some passing girls to stare at us.

  “Stop.” I giggle, hitting his arm.

  “What? It’s true. Admit it.” Bass stops walking and steps in front of me. Grabbing my arms, he pins me with a sassy stare. “Admit it.”

  “Some spice would be nice.”

  Bass throws his head back in laughter. “Spice is always nice, dollface. The spicier, the better.”

  I just shake my head at my friend as we continue walking.

  Ever since Landon and I decided to date, he’s taken it very seriously. He wants to prove to me that he respects me, and because of that, he’s insisted on turning down the knob that controls the uninhibited nights of sex, much to my displeasure. He doesn’t need to prove anything to me though. I know his heart.

  I don’t regret our wild night after the house party. In fact, it’s on the highli
ght reel of my life, and I’ve played it over in my head many times. That night gave me Landon in a way I’d never known was possible. It changed the course of my life and led me here, to a state of euphoric happiness.

  I’ve told Landon this many times, but he’s set on “doing it right.” I’m just really hoping that, in his version of our dating narrative, a month is the magic amount of time to wait to take it to the next level.

  “You’re so ridiculous,” I tell Sebastian with a laugh.

  “It’s a gift.” He winks. “So, what has he told you?”

  “I already told you everything. He told me to be ready at seven and to pack an overnight bag with a couple of changes of clothes. That’s all,” I repeat a part of my previous conversation with Sebastian.

  “Okay, but did he tell you what type of clothing to pack?”

  We turn the corner onto the street of my dorms.

  I stop walking. “I don’t have to go back yet. Do you?”

  He shakes his head. “Nope. I’m free.”

  “Afternoon delight?” I ask, which is our code for ice cream.

  Why we don’t just say ice cream, I don’t know. Sebastian came up with afternoon delight, and it stuck.

  “Uh, yes. Totally.”

  We turn around and head back in the direction from which we came.

  “So, types of clothes?” Sebastian reminds me.

  “Oh, yeah. He said a couple of comfortable outfits and a fancier outfit.”

  “Fancy? Hmm … that’s intriguing.” He taps his finger over his lips.

  “It probably just means he’s taking me out to dinner or something.”

  He nods. “Could be. Or …” Sebastian starts to list all of the places Landon could be taking me.

  We order our cold desserts and walk to the park adjacent to the ice cream shop.

  We sit on the soft grass below an old oak tree, its trunk large enough to support us both as we lean back against it.

  “Like a fancy bed-and-breakfast maybe?” He licks his double scoop of cookies and cream.

  “Aren’t we too young for bed-and-breakfasts? I mean, grandparents stay at those.” I take a bite of my mint chocolate chip.

  “No, they’re coming back in style. There are some really posh ones now.”

  I grin. “Oh, yeah? I guess I missed this breaking news …” I wave my hand out in front of me in dramatic fashion. “Just in, bed-and-breakfasts are back and better than ever,” I say in my best attempt at a newscaster’s voice.

  “You’re silly.” He laughs. “Ready to trade?” He holds out his ice cream cone toward me.

  The first time we got an afternoon delight, we couldn’t decide on the flavors we wanted. So, we picked our top two choices, and then halfway through the cone, we traded. It’s become our thing now.

  “Yes.” I start to hand him my cone before pulling it back. “Wait. I don’t want to get you sick.”

  “Oh, that’s right. I forgot. Good call.”

  For the past couple of days, I’ve been feeling like I’m getting the flu. It’s still pretty early for flu season, but it would totally be my luck to get it right before my and Landon’s anniversary weekend. I’ve been chugging Vitamin C drinks like it’s my job and thinking healthy thoughts. I refuse to be sick this weekend.

  “Actually, it kind of works out because I’m really digging the mint chocolate chip today. It tastes better than normal. Like, I’m sort of obsessed.” I take a long lick of the creamy goodness.

  “Well, now, you’re just being mean,” Sebastian scoffs.

  I chuckle. “I’m sorry. I’m not teasing. It’s just really good.”

  Sebastian huffs dramatically and continues on eating his own cone. Eventually, we finish our cones, and we’ve exhausted our surprise-weekend date options. It’s time for me to head back to shower and get ready to see Landon. I can hardly wait.

  I nod into the mirror.

  Not bad.

  My long brown hair falls over my shoulder in perfect curls. My makeup is on point, and I’m pleased with the little black dress I chose. With an accessory change, my outfit could say outdoor picnic or swanky night out.

  I grab my small flowery notebook and take a seat at the desk.

  Tapping my glittery pink gel pen against my lips, I think a moment before writing.

  Anniversaries

  An incredible friend

  Mint chocolate chip ice cream

  I’m finishing the M in cream when he says, “What are you grateful for today?” causing me to jump from my seat with a yelp.

  Landon laughs as I hold my hand to my chest.

  “Jeez, you scared me. I didn’t hear you come in.”

  “Yeah, Megan let me in.”

  He leans against the bedroom doorframe, looking as strikingly attractive as ever. His hazels shine with a deep green today, and the day-old scruff that covers his jaw makes my pulse quicken. I take note of his gray slacks and black shirt and how his outfit complements my own.

  “You look incredible, Ames.”

  “You do, too.” I stand and walk to him, draping my arms around his neck as he slowly eliminates the distance between our mouths.

  I open my mouth and inhale his minty taste as his tongue moves seductively against mine. My heart thrums wildly in my chest. His lips are intoxicating. It will never cease to amaze me—having Landon like this, as my man and not just my buddy.

  My body presses against Landon’s on instinct, and I slide my fingers through the back of his short hair, pulling our faces closer. I catch his needy groan in my mouth as his fingers dig into my sides. I feel his rapidly growing need for me against his pants, and it shoots chills down my body.

  Landon moves his hands up my arms and takes a step back, putting distance between us. My body sinks at the loss of his warmth. I steady myself with a sigh.

  He leaves me wanting, as always.

  Landon swallows hard and rolls his neck from side to side. “So?” he asks, his voice drops an octave, making him sound even more sexy.

  I pull my bottom lip through my teeth. “So what?”

  “What’d you write?” Landon’s question dampens some of my lust and brings me back to the present.

  He is familiar with my Communication professor’s daily journal of gratitude assignment because he had it, too, a couple of year ago.

  “Oh, um …” I think back to moments ago. “Oh, yeah … anniversaries.” I shoot Landon a knowing smirk. “Sebastian and ice cream—mint chocolate chip, to be exact.”

  Landon nods in approval. “So, you didn’t want to wait until later? I know parts of tonight should end up in there.” He squeezes my waist as he kisses my head.

  “Oh, I know they will. Don’t worry; you’ll get all the entries for the rest of the weekend, I’m sure.” I stand on my tiptoes and give him a peck on the lips.

  “Damn straight.”

  I shake my head in amusement. “You know the entire journal can’t be about you, right?”

  “If I were in that class right now, every page would be filled with you,” he says sincerely.

  “Seriously, who are you? And where were you the first nineteen years of my life?” I laugh.

  “It just wasn’t our time then.” He shrugs. “Plus, I had to annoy you for all those years to allow you to put up with me now.”

  “So, you had to build up my tolerance level?” I chuckle.

  “Exactly.”

  “So, where are we going? I can’t wait any longer.”

  “Me either,” he says in a husky timbre. “I never thought this night would come.”

  Shivers run down my spine, and I desperately ache for Landon in all the ways I had him a month ago.

  “Grab your bag. Let’s go.”

  I scurry across my room and snatch up my packed bag. He doesn’t have to ask me twice.

  “Oh, Amy, another thing,” Landon says.

  “Yeah?”

  “Grab your passport.”

  Amy

  The way he feels.

&n
bsp; The way he tastes.

  The way he sounds.

  We’re heading east on Interstate 94, and I suspect that we’re taking a flight somewhere until we pass by the airport. As we drive into Detroit, I start to see the signs for the bridge to Canada.

  “So, Canada?” I ask.

  “Yep,” Landon replies, squeezing my hand.

  I’m excited. Canada’s just an hour east of Ann Arbor and is really popular with freshmen and sophomores at school, given the nineteen-year-old drinking age of the country. Megan and her group of friends have already driven to Canada a couple of times, and we’re just a month into the semester. She raves about the clubs right across the border. I imagine that it’s totally Megan’s scene, and although I’m sure it’s fun, it’s not what I imagined for our romantic weekend.

  “Don’t worry. We’re not going clubbing,” Landon says as if reading my mind. “I booked a luxury suite at one of the casinos. We have a reservation at a nice restaurant for tonight. I thought it might be fun to walk around the casino and gamble for a bit. There is a club in the casino if you want to dance, but I’m thinking we’ll spend most of the weekend in our room. I thought Canada would be nice, so you could have a glass of wine with dinner if you wanted or order a drink when we’re out.”

  “It sounds great.” I say. Especially the room part.

  We arrive at the casino. Our suite is magnificent. It’s on the top floor, and one of the walls is a floor-to-ceiling window that overlook the lights of Ontario. It has the biggest king-size bed I’ve ever seen and a hot tub right in the room.

  “Wow,” I say as I walk around. “It’s going to be hard to leave this room. Oh, I didn’t bring my suit,” I note, looking toward the hot tub.

  “You won’t need one.” Landon shoots me a grin.

  “So, you’re finally going to put an end to this abstinence crusade you’ve been on for the past month?” I raise an eyebrow in question.

  Landon walks toward me until his face is a mere breath away from mine. “If that’s what you want,” he says, his voice low.

  I swallow, wrapping my arms around his back. “That’s definitely what I want.”

  He pulls me in closer before tucking my hair behind my ear. “I just wanted to do things right with you. You’re different, Amy. I’m not proud of the way we started regardless of how fucking incredible it felt.”